45km at altitude on the inca trail

Inca trail
6.30am meet in town. Daren’t be late after being late for the meeting last night due to theft issues!! Head to get taxi panicking that I’ve never ordered a taxi to town on my own! Aaahhh. It’s ok I remembered the name, phew. And await my guide from 6.20. I’m beeped at by vehicles a good 20-30 times, no not because I’m so attractive it’s those bloomin taxis!! Probably doesn’t help I’m checking out every vehicle that passes hoping it’s the tour guide! It gets to 6.40 and I start to worry, no it’s ok Peruvian time!! 6.50? Start to look for contact number in case I need to call, damn it left the receipt at flat!! 6.55 he turns up, no apology just ola samantha!! Thank god though! The trip begins!!
Well I say that but then he drops me on a street corner!! And heads of to get more people. They start arriving and are various nationalities but English. May be a lonely trek! Eventually some Aussies turn up so I latch on to them like a leech!! Lovely people. So we have 16 and a baby. 5 chicas and 12 chicos. German, Australian, Dutch, chilians, Argentinians, Spanish, Peruvian and me!!
Varied sized backpacks. Some are the height of a small child, the smallest a day sac.
On the coach travelling through the beautiful Andes. Stop at a shop and toilets but get bloody done over like a true tourist when I buy a bottle of coke and starbursts! Paid way over the odds. Beautiful setting, couple of pooches to stroke so may have fleas now!!
Head off again and pick up our porters. They carry our tents and food the whole way. I get one sat next to me on coach, stinks!! I look at his feet and not sure when they were last washed. Yuk!
At the start of the trek we find out we have to carry our bed mats. The cheek! All trying to squeeze into backpacks. And it’s due to rain so need backpack covers. Glad I bought new rucksack as has cover with it, and would never of fitted sleeping bag or mat in my old camel pac!
New admiration for the porters. They are carrying gas cylinders, chairs, tents etc up the mountain, so strong!
I’ve properly latched onto Aussies! New family for 4 days. We have a Dutch Jim Carey in our group, looks just like him when smiling!
Have to show passport to get to inca trail and get another stamp result! Then the trek begins. Peruvian flat- That’s constant up and down. Starts to rain so the group look hilarious in various ponchos! My walking boots are falling apart, not good! Clearly leaving them untouched in about a year at home wasn’t the best preparation. Hope they hold out for the trek!
Again wishing my trousers were waterproof as now have various wet patches for the day.
We stop occasionally for toilets, 1 sole each time. Then before lunch to get out the rain we have a long stop. I’m 3rd in group and guide calls me ‘strong girl’. Check me out!!
We stop at an inca site. Amazing to see. The guide tells us the history of the village and terraces. We walk through the rebuilt homes. Learnt about the local language that is now taught in schools ketchwan. Loving this! The heavens open so more ponchos bought and we hide under cover for half hour.
Lunch was a three course meal can you believe it. Sat down at a table in the mountains, didn’t expect that. We have avocado starter, soup then trout and noodles. Spoilt! Followed by cocoa drink! Sun came out for lunch so nice to relax in sun but soon went when we walked again. Chatted to mad haired Argentinian he’s very nice has the Beckham haircut and loud trousered Germans who tried the cocoa leaves at one of the stops. The charmer of the three looked like a lama chewing his leaves!! Nice group.
Arrived at camp to find tents up ready. Lovely and quiet! Warm shower available for 5soles but I have no towel as told there were no showers! Wash face and body wipe for me!!Lol
so the group is:
Aussie sisters one engaged to a Peruvian. Calling her ausuvian!
Dutch couple with their baby, Jim carrey lookalike and Indonesian wife. Baby so cute, Jim carries her along the walk and she’s so good! Spanish boys, hairy and balding. German dad and son with friend, son- Beard and friend-charmer. Argentinian threesome. The David Beckham Mohawk, one who looks like a young john travolta although balding and then the last one with an eyebrow piercing who’s got cute dimples finally Chilean couple very in love as always canoodling!
We had snacks at 6pm which was popcorn, biscuits and hot drinks. We thought that was it but no, an hour later more lovely food. Stuffed! Group are lovely, David Beckham keeps apologising for his English but he’s very good. He’s single but think a tad young!!
I’m bunking with Aussie sister, and just fit into tent. If you’re 6ft you’re in trouble! Raining as we head to bed so hope we’re not soaked in morning! 5 am start for the toughest day! Rained all night and couldn’t get comfy on the hard ground!
Toilet in morning was gross, someone clearly ill in the night and missed toilet bowl! The joys of camping!
Porridge and bread for breakfast, very warming. We have a tough
day as 1200m altitude to cover
Porters still amaze us as run past us at times!! We pass locals living on the inka trail, no luxuries, live off the land! How nice to be content with that.
Jim carrey is like iron man. He just trots past us with camp baby on his back. Full of energy!
So beautiful here, enjoying the scenery then English go past with music blaring. Why??!! Bloody chavs! Enjoy the natural noises!
You see some sights of people walking past. Denim shorts to trek in? Tight jeans and converse shoes?
There are the slow people like snails just keep going slowly but surely. Although note to all don’t wear light coloured trousers if you’re probe to a sweaty bum! I had to follow a sweaty bum for a while, you can’t but look!
Germans in our group are the fastest but live in mountains!! They just zoom off on the walk! Iron man x 3!
Toilets on the trail are either squat or dirty so you daren’t sit on them so you have to squat!!
By 10am we have walked for 4 hours already! Really understand why athletes train at altitude it’s very demanding. Obviously I’m now a super athlete but have to hide it as not to shine too much!
Porters grateful for treats so Aussie sister often hands them some. She eats like a bird don’t know how she has the energy to trek!
Ausuvian knee hurts poor thing, going to be a hard few days.
I’m called Jungle girl and spice girl by Aussies. I like a nickname makes me feel liked!!
And I Love how Aussies say Sam, voice goes up at the end!
Beckham hair calls me teacher, very amusing shouting up the mountain hey teacher!!
So going up, you have to take little steps to save leg muscles, so look for lower steps to step up. About 20 steps and out of breath! Don’t think I’ve ever walked so slow!
Even porters slow going up. Followed one for a while to get best route but you get a whiff of Peruvian sweat so best not to for too long!
At highest point I arrived as one of the first, not a race indeed but nice to know you’re fit!! Waited at top for Aussies rather than rush off with speedsters. And the clouds cleared whilst waiting so fab photo shot! 4250 m high!! Freezing!
Way down my legs did not work!! Shaking badly so slowly does it, Aussies with their little legs speed ahead! Lovely on own though so peaceful! Get to camp at 1.30. 7 hours after setting off. Knackered!!
Jim carrey heads off for a run. I tell you he’s not human! I Sleep for a bit before lunch, then brave the cold shower. Didn’t bring a towel so dry with a t shirt. It is freezing!! And it’s not what you call a shower, a stream of cold water! And toilets next door stink so a lovely aroma for you to shower with! Then the floor is muddy so feet don’t get clean. If I’d had a towel a dip in the river would of been as cold but more useful and cleaner!
But at least I’m cleaner!!
Head back and dive into sleeping bag to warm up!
Found out Aussie sister owns a bistro and is moving to Melbourne. Must tell my mates to visit!! And another reason to return to Oz!
We have a medical machinery engineer, an airbus engineer, extreme sports operators, polio vaccine manager, pilot, air hostess and restaurant owner to name a few. Interesting bunch! The Germans are very good skiers live on Austrian boarder. They have different skis for different conditions at home, that’s what locals do! Wel jel!
Toilets are a few mins walk away
today, fine in daylight. Hole in the ground, nice! And the cord to flush is the dirtiest toilet cord I’ve seen, damp and yucky! Just imagine how many dirty hands have touched it!
At night got lost in dark finding the toilet, trod in a ditch, sodden foot, hope I don’t need a pee in the night I’ll never find it
So our tent didn’t do up inside! Joy a damp and mosquito ridden night!
Felt really ill again, tried to lie still but thought I was either going to be sick or other end!! It was pissing down outside, roomy was by the open door, not good if I needed to dash. Eventually stomach settled so tried to sleep. Tents are on concrete not grass, so uncomfortable. At 10.30 ausuvian appears their tent is leaking and they are soaked so try and get 4 in our tent. Warmer at least!
During the night get bouts of sleep but my back is in agony. Wake to find Peruvian gone he had to go back to wet tent as he was getting wet in our non closing door. Poor thing. At least I’m not feeling sick at the moment just tired and bad back!
Ausuvian and Peruvian also ill in night do maybe something we ate? Breakfast lots of miserable tired people!! The quote of the tour is from ausuvian who comes back from toilet saying ‘I’ve finally mastered the art of using the toilets!’ Love it!! That is an art indeed when you become confident at squatting on toilets.
Day 3-Legs tired and it’s uphill to start! We stop to see an inca ruins. It’s a stop off for the incas messengers. Learn that the incas did the trail in 8hrs. And there used to be a race of the trail for locals and a porter did it in 3hrs 45! And he’s a porter today!! Also the mountain marathon was in Peru last year, 41 started it, 14 finished and in 8hrs. Shows you how fit the porters are!! But then the fun begins downhill! Legs do as they are told today so can jog a bit!
We bump into a Scandinavian girl who’s clearly on the pull. In skinny jeans and rayban glasses! Saw her yesterday as well. Am I bitchy or jealous! Lol
Theres an annoying American gay girl who’s limping today. In my cynical view I reckon her legs ache today so she’s pretending she’s injured!! Yesterday she was very loud and assertive in her group speeding off. I’m such a bitch! Lunch at a lovely spot but then the downpour again! Have a nice chat to Aussie sister and compare online dating notes. She’s tried RSVP in Oz but calls is RSPCA, love it. We find out that instead if trekking 16km today almost to matchu pitchu we are going 9 and therefore will be one of the last groups to get there. Spanish guys fuming and have had an argument with reps. We’re all gutted and will complain upon return but what can you do! So after just another hour we are done for the day! A whole afternoon of nothing to do, very depressed campsite. And the toilets are a new low! Portacabins with concrete holes and no flush!
For the first time in 3 days we have a phone signal so I call home to say hello from the inca trail. Mum was rushing me off the phone, saying don’t keep your dad talking his dinner will get cold! How rude!!
Take off shoes to reveal they are no longer waterproof. Wet socks and manky feet! Nice. No shower here so cold water tap to clean them. Think I’ll be leaving the shoes in Peru!
In tent and a family if lamas goes past! At least it’s entertainment!!
At dinner we discuss tips for porters. Spanish and Argentinians refuse to put in and rush off. So rude, the porters work their arse off and didn’t get as much of a tip. Those of us who did are fuming. Ggggrrrrrr!
Porters introduced themselves and we think get 25 soles each but should of been over 30! Tight bloody spaniards!!
3 am start in morning to get to machu pitchu early. Still bloody raining and hope tent keeps dry!
I sleep fairly well but Aussie sister says she was freezing and hardly slept. We are off walking by 4am. Porters pack up very quick. Hairy spaniard moaning as usual about tents! Quite interesting trekking in the dark, although note to self buy a decent torch as I struggled to see. I manage to twist ankle when falling but it recovers and just bruises! Stop at camp we thought we were camping at. Bottom sections not great, and toilets crap again so think we did ok. We get to control ten minutes after it opens so not bad after a longer journey.
Get another stamp in passport. Yay!
The group is very dispersed today and bloody Argentinians play music from speaker. I don’t want to hear it!!! Aaahhhh, so make sure I’m not near them. Get to sun gate Which should overlook machu pitchu but fog covers everywhere so no view. Spanish moaning when we go to leave, rude to guides. Hate it, there’s no need. They stay at top hoping fog will lift and we continue. Shane we didn’t get that view after the hard work but after 3 days of rain the sun peaking out is a bonus.
I have to follow so real smelly Trekkers, not good! Aussie sister comments on the smell ones of the Germans too!
We arrive at machu pitchu to see fog still but it gradually lifts to show its wonder. Amazing. Group photo without the moaners who stayed at the sun gate. It’s ok didn’t like their attitude anyway! Have a lovely time looking at views, walking around and hearing its history. Blazing hot now do in shorts and t shirt. So very excited that the toilets at machu pitchu are sit down and with toilet roll and hand wash. Oh the luxuries. We hear lots of others very excited at this prospect too!
I’m hanging with Aussies as don’t want to get left alone. They have a bus ticket down to the town so we don’t walk. Get to town and head first to buy me a clean t shirt then to hot springs. Amazing to sit in natural spring with mountains around us.
Chat to some girls who we’d seen trekking. They tell us how rude our Argentinians were at times. Dick heads!Nice to be clean! All us girls go commando rather than out dirty underwear on. How raunchy! Head off for food. It’s my first vegetarian restaurant as ausuvian and Peruvian are veggies. My burger was lovely, ausuvian a meal bland. Shame as quite expensive. Aussie sister and I head off to find a bank, wifi and a beer. I bump into Irish dudes, they scream in town when they see me which was lovely. Felt very loved! They paid more but had a better camp experience. Can’t believe we never met on mountain!
Find a lovely bar overlooking river. I try a pisco sour to celebrate and like it! See annoying American walk past, no limp???
Head to get train back. Hoping we aren’t next to smelly people. We see most of the group at the station, Germans have been drinking! Chat to hairy spaniard but he’s such a boring twat, and stinks!
Fortunately next to a random on train so can chill. Germans are next to me though, and Argentinians behind. Hope they sleep! Germans left their flight tickets in station. Fortunately here in Peru you have numbered seats and honest people so they get them back!
Free drink and snack in ride home, nice! Germans are fast asleep within minutes! Drunks, lol. We had the company of a bat in our carriage for a while. Screaming etc from passengers, poor thing! Staff removed it, Germans didn’t stir!
Off to get a coach to cusco, some extras join our group which is weird after 4 days as an isolated group. Arrive in cusco and quite sad to say goodbye to people you’ve spent 4 days with.
Have some contacts of Aussies and Dutch so hope to keep in touch. Get back home longing for a toilet with a seat and a warm shower followed by a mattress. Such luxuries!!


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